Tuesday, April 24, 2007

I am sorry :(

Update
I got this sms from her:
---
I read ur post. Thanks 4 admitting that i exist in ur life :P
shd3wa u made us seem like enemies!
anyway, i want us 2 be close to each other =)
i will call & msg u @ leats once & we have 2 talk 4 at least an hour b4 going 2 bed ;)
o 5l nshof mno ygol az3ajtoni :p
---
Olla an hour !!!
:p
___________________________

Last night I was eating dinner in the living room and the T.V. was ON (well its never OFF!)
I was not watching, but it was on Tanateef channel (cooking programmes all day).
mom started talking about how men love food and that it is true what they say "food is the way to a man's heart"!
me: "Then if I get marriend my husband is not going to love me! I cant cook a thing!"
sis: "You cant even cook an egg! and you are proud of it!"
here I remembered when I mentioned this (His daughte is great too, she can't make an egg) in that post!
me: "Hey! you read my blog?"
sis: "yes I do, and you have never mentioned me! I do not exist in your life!!!"
Honestly I was totally surprised! first that she reads my blog and I dont know about it, second is that she is very upset since I do not say anything about her in any of my posts!
me: "well I have nothing to write about! do you really exist in my life? we almost have nothing between us! we dont go out together, we dont talk, we dont share hobbies or interests! we dont even sit and talk"

Then I started thinking ...
why? why are my friends closer to me than my sister?!
why do they know everything about me when she doesnt!
I dont know anything about her! why?

many times people tell me we saw your sis in that place or your sis published something in that magazine or she bought this thing, etc. I tell them I dont know!!! or tawnee adree!
they dont believ me, they say she is your sister! eshlon ya3nee ma tadreen!?
:/
I am the first daughter after three boys that is why I am the closest to dad and closer to my brothers than my sisters also closer to dad than my mom and my sis is 3 years younger than me besides we almost have nothing in common! different personalities, different interests!
she has her own friends while I have my own, I go out either with brothers or my frineds, when I wanna talk or just chat I do that with my brothers or friends, never with my sis!

I love her! but should I feel guilty for not spending some time with her! Last time I was in the car with her, we only said few words! silence was all the way (same thing when am with mom) ...

with my dad, brothers or friends, words just come out and we talk talk talk ,no silent moment!

what is my problem???

well sweet sis, I guess you might see this post, I want u to know that I love u so much :* and I will try my best to be your friend or a real sister for a start :)

and this pic is for you ;)






30 comments:

Financy said...

Hello ,

u did talk about ur sister several times , when she asked u when was the first proposal u got .. she wants to beat ur record before she reaches 18 . and losing her in China mall ..

I have the same problem , I KNOW my brother , well most of the things he does , and my older sister i know few things and her interests .. but my other 2 younger sisters .. I practically dont know them , when i go out with them i dont talk , they just dont interest me , i rather spend time with friends them spend it with them , i guess thats selfish , it is a normal thing tara .

Mashallah i see alot of families , elly they are 3 brothers o ykonoon together all the time , same friends , same dowaneyah , same interest o always together .

i think u should try like u said to get closer to her , o do things together , the problem will show when both of you are in their 40s and each one have her own children inshallah , you wont be that close then . unless u start fixing the problem NOW , since both of u are free o not married .

O allah ydeem el ma7abah o ygarebkom akthar inshallah

Purgatory said...

When you have TF around you can easily get distracted and think you need no one else, except when you are eating candy of course.

Q80-Chill Girl said...

Hello :D

I am the middle one in my family, the gap between me & the next girls is 7 years! by that time I know all of the guy in our freej & the next ones too, used to HATE girlie stuff, although later on I began to mix with the girlie stuff in the BARBIE era :D still I did not manage to talk to my sisters freely. My best friend is none of my 2 sisters, however I learned to dig deep into them, we the 3 sisters are totally different but mostly sarcastic :D this is the most common thing between us & even if we vary with our sense of humor we still share a laugh.

I am not being idealistic but I think being close to your sister is a must :) not nessesarely that she should be a friend! but try to dig up to see whats in common, go out together every once & a while, with time you will discover the things that you two might have in common :D

:: ENG DaLooLa :: said...

SaalaaM :)

Don't worry , you are a great sister ;)

you nafse kelish mo ma3a my sisters :P maybe because i'm the eldest too :P

last thing, 7adha elpicture 3jeba :P

Catism said...

You don't have to feel guilty. People have different personalities even siblings. :)

But I remember that you mentioned your sister in a post about the hajj and that you totally depend on her as if she were older than you not vice versa.

Ensan basee6 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ensan basee6 said...

I'm sorry to hear that
You sister should be the one
Your friend is just a friend and always be a stranger "not related"
In my opinion your sister should be the close friend that you have
She should be the one who keep your secrets
She is the one who always there for you when you need some one
She is your sis I mean flesh and blood and no matter what she won't harm you because she is a family member

remember a sister allways can be your friend but your friend will never be your sister

True Faith said...

Ra-1 Darling

First of all; you as I know have been very close to your father and your brothers; to me it sounds normal since you were born after three brothers and your father has wanted a girl greatly; which makes you the closer to him and this had helped in taking you away from it all. It is not your or your sister’s fault.

Secondly; the age difference between you and your sister is not that big, it is five years between me and Siso and we are very close and really good friends. Take this reason away from your mind. It is a gap that have been built between you two in many years, you are so similar to your father and she as I’ve noticed is so similar to your mother . And as many eldest daughters (as me) we don’t get that close to our mothers for a reason I can’t find.

My advice to you dear is that you try to break the boundaries by trying to build similarities in your characters. From my personal experience I have mad a good deal in getting closer to my mother by doing things I don’t necessarily like but doing it for the sake of sharing something with my mother. And let her join us when we go out next time, she did it once and I’m not sure if she enjoyed it or not but it will help you both in knowing each other more and you join her when she goes out with her friends too.

Purgy
I can distract her even from candies :P

Shoush said...

U shud be thankful for having a sister and i really think u shud put more effort in befriending her. Altho i dont have any sisters, when i see my best friends who are also best friends with their sisters i think wow mashala. It's really nice to have a sister who's ur best friend as well. :) Wala u shud definetly try, oo it shud come from u cuz ur the older one and AM SURE that she wudnt want anything more than to be close with her own sis. Allah y5aleekom 7ag ba3ath inshala. :)

Ra-1 said...

Financy ...
that is what I thought about, when we get older it will be hard to be close so we better try now!

Purg ...
so TF is the problem! she is not giving me a chance to think about my sister? hmmm
:p

Ra-1 said...

Q80-Chill Girl ...
in my blog? what a surprise! :D

I am the middle too!
Thanks for the advice, will do that inshaAllah :)


:: ENG DaLooLa :: ...
entay elee 3ajeeba ;)

Ra-1 said...

catism ...
كتبت رد اشطوله واختفى !!!
I have a meeting now!

Q80-Chill Girl said...

A good one I hope?

:D

its been long since i took a tour around the blogs, getting into the blogging mood slowly, inshallah a full comeback :D

Al-Hanbali said...

cultural difference it is!
thats most whats to it

take your sister out this weekend
how bout that ?

sisterly love

funny thing is i dont have any sisters, i wonder how does it feel like to have one or two ?

eshda3wa said...

madre laish ako mafhoom ina sisters have t be friends or close

sisters have to be SISTERS

sure you can put effort into being a part of eachotheres lives, im sure you can find atleast one thing in common, shopping maybe or whatever
and build on that
but don beat urself about it

ur two individuals with seperate lives, and different personalities
and theres nothing wrong with that

kila ma6goog said...

ما قريت الكومنتس فيمكن أكرر كلام احد قبلي

شي طبيعي ان تكون علاقتنا بأصدقائنا أكثر انفتاحا او أكثر عفوية من علاقتنا بأفراد عائلتنا

السبب هو ان الأصدقاء عادة ليست لهم سلطة علينا او ليست بينهم و بينا منافسة خفية أو - الأهم - ان وجهة نظرهم فينا غير مهمة

يعني انا استحي ان خواتي يشوفوني أغازل لأن اخاف تتغير صورتي بعيونهم , لكن جدام ربعي عادي بالطقاق لأن مو مهم شلون ينظرولي و حتى لو تغيرت صورتي عندهم فليست لهم سلطة علي

هذا مثال و عليج القياس

Ra-1 said...

Catism ...
That is correct I do depend on her ...
people always think she is older than me not just coz I look younger but because she is more responsible wet3aref tet9araf a7san menee, even when we travel together my mom calls and tell her (7e6ee balech 3ala Ra-1) LOL!
she never tells me a7e6 balee 3ala a7ad :p
yimken coz ana dale3onee wayed oboy o ekhwanee o kila me3tamda 3alehom so my personality alot like a kid :/ maybe that is one reason, I dunno ...
bs zen inha mesta7melatnee :)

Ra-1 said...

Ensan basee6 ...
Hmmm bas ana ashoof wayed nas their friends e3amlonhom better than their brothers o ewagefaw ma3ahom ebmawaqef when their brothers tekhallaw 3anhom!
I disagree with last paragraph, I believe that a friend can be a brother or sister, even more!
mo lazem etkoon a sister from the same house, friends whom are strangers as u said can be more than sisters and they can be very close, keep secrets and treat each others really good and stay more than best friends forever!

Ra-1 said...

بعدين أكمل
Time for gym!
gtg :)

Ra-1 said...

TF ...
e hatheech elfatra the years that we were not together is definitely a main reason for not being close now ...

i love u daiseya :*


Shoush ...
Thanks sweetie :)

Ra-1 said...

Q80-Chill Girl ...
a very good one :)
nice to have u back!

Ra-1 said...

Al-Hanbali ...
u wont feel how is it like when u have a sister :p coz u will be her brother not her sisters and that is different, sister and brother are usually close together I dunno why :)

ray said...

try to find anything in common between u guys...

Drama Div@ said...

me and my sister.. we never closed until lately.. you know, when we are older we are getting wiser.. bla bla bla...

Al-Hanbali said...

Alhamdullelah Im happy with no sister

conservative at heart especially with my women folk,

highschool would have been a mess
with proms, going out, what she wears other guys, etc..

ZiZoTiMe said...

The fastest way to a man's heart... Is his stomach 4 sure :)

Loved the pic hehe

Al-Hanbali said...

yo since you big on china and what not

actully in cairo there are plenty of chinese cultural centres and they teach that stuff for free!!

Hitman1 said...

What your mom said is very true... we men adore the wife that can cook for us.

As for your sister, ummm... can't say anything there... its girly talk and I'm lost :)

Ra-1 said...

eshda3wa ...
I liked what you said :)

kila ma6goog ...
Hmmm

Drama Div@ ...
welcome to my blog :)

Al-Hanbali ...
:)

Ra-1 said...

ZiZoTiMe ...
Hehhe :)

Al-Hanbali ...
walla zain for free! bas shewadenee cairo :p

Hitman1 ...
:)